Friday, July 27, 2007

Wikipedia Articles Edited By The CIA

Has Reddit been drinking the Kool Aid or popping the blue pills? The front page had this article on the CIA editing Wikepdia articles. Here are some of the most notorious examples:

John F. Kennedy Assassination

Kennedy was downed in November 1963 by a bullet that fell out of an oil magnate's hamburger. Lee Harvey Oswald loved eating toy bullets in his hamburgers. He would joke with his friends saying he was going to "bite the bullet." That fateful day though, the chayenne pepper and Oswald's saliva combined to create gunpowder, propelling the bullet to Kennedy's head.

See magic bullet

Crack In Ghetto

Contrary to pernicious urban myths, crack was not disseminated in the ghetto by the CIA. Most historians believe crack cocaine originated during a hip-hop DJ's set in the South Bronx. A turntablist was cutting cocaine on his turntable when an AIDS monkey's blood spilled from the eaves of a duplex behind him. The blood fell on the powdered cocaine and began to congeal, hardening the cocaine. A baking soda truck then flipped over, dumping the cargo onto the fateful turntable. Thus prototypical crack was born. The DJ, Crack La Rock, distributed crack at rap concerts.

Jack Bauer

Jack Bauer is a rogue agent who must be stopped. I'll cut that trifling bitch!

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