Orlando

(courtesy of Scopy Cat)

I am on vacation with my family in the happiest place on Earth. I go to Orlando every year with my family. But this year, I've really made an effort to explore the psychogeography of The City Beautiful.

Specificaly, I have been interested in Orlando's role in arts and entertainment. LA is famous for its contributions to cinema; New York is famous for everything else. Austin is memorialized as a city of conspiracy theory kooks and loquacious stoners by Richard Linklater (forgive the club footed prose, I'm on vacation).

According to Wikipedia, here is a list of Orlando's major contributions to arts and entertainment (I've put an asterisk next to the ones I like):

Britney Spears
N'Sync
Backstreet Boys
Creed
Matchbox 20
7 Mary 3
Sister Hazel
Less Than Jake
Tom Petty*
Larry the Cable Guy
Wayne Brady
Wesley Snipes*

From this list, I am inclined to conclude that Orlando really is the city to get away from it all. Despite a huge black and latino population, Orlando is known for not-so-ethnic tourist traps (really, isn't Orlando itself a tourist trap) like Disney World and Sea World. Getting away from it all big-time. Coney Island embraces blacks and freaks, Disney World prices them out. Sure I'm going with my family; sure I like Disney World; just sayin'.

But it's not just the attractions - and, when you get down to it, Orlando, more than any other city, is known for attractions as opposed to art (I will compare the two tomorrow). It's known for Larry the Cable Guy and N'Sync. Looking at the above list, I see an MOR, test-market approved, family friendly (neither Larry the Cable Guy nor Wayne Brady say fuck), predominantly Christian culture.

Once again, just sayin'.

My friend is down in Orlando and I hope to meet up with him and do an open mic downtown. I wonder if all the comics are hacks who do material for fatigued tourists with ruddy faces and sullen teenage brats. Or do the comics resent this stereotype so much that they will create an equal and opposing force of comics that ... offer amazing rides and attractions the whole family can enjoy?

I don't know, but I do really want to know if we have any single people in the room tonight.