Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Fuck You, I Am the Man of the Year

Frank Rich and George Will have a problem with Time magazine's cover. The one that says "You" are the person of the year. I can see why. It is a little desperate. But I resent that they argue, as Brian Williams does in that same PotY issue, that New Media/Web 2.0 is all about self-absorbed brats who want to talk about their lives. Are you fucking kidding me? People still think that all blogs are personal? That all YouTubes are like Loonygirl15? That there are no blogs or YouTubes that talk about Iraq?!!! Have we heard of political bloggers or military bloggers? Did we not see war footage on YouTube yet Frank? We know you are important, but reread your fucking editor's notes every now and again. Unfucking real.

I am especially pissed off because I never write about my personal accomplishments on this blog. And believe me there are many. I could have written about:

* the time I saved the kitten stuck in the space elevator
* the time I saved Tyco Brahe's corpse from Opie and Anthony

Hey, put that mustache down!

* the time I did a stand-up comedy gig at Bumbershoot, put it on YouTube and ended the war between Israel and Lebanon

* the time I taped "Veronica Mars" for my parents

But I never write about these things on my blog. Instead, I selflessly put aside these small but precious victories and herald the arrival of things bigger than me like puppet chic and insurance rap. So, yes, I, Mo Exclamation Point, am the man of the year. I would love to write a long thank-you list, but I see a couple of shock jocks fondling Nicolaus Copernicus.

This year man of the year, next year sexiest man alive!

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