The 12 Funniest People on the Internet

Valleywag has a list of the 12 funniest people on the Internet. One of the people on the list is Bob Powers, author of the second most popular blog written by a comedian, Girls are Pretty. I've met him and I must say he's one of the nicest popular people out there.

For shits, giggles and suds, I'm gonna compare them to the top ten comedians on MySpace, the portal for dummies who don't know the Web. I also think oranges are juicier than apples. What?

Andy Samberg vs. Dane Cook [note: he's not on the list but he has a million friends so obviously he's number one]: From any angle (comedy nerd, nerd comedy, popularity) I think it's reaaaaally obvious that Samberg's the winner here. Employee of the Month tanked while "Dick in a Box" is still on everyone's lips...as a word-of-mouth phenomenon. Plus Dane Cook's recent MySpace hissy fit makes Samberg the ruler of mainstream Internet comedy.


He made a video called "Dick in a Box," I'm making one called "Dildo in a Box." How is that not different, bro?

Violent Acres vs. Carlos Mencia: Slight edge to the Violent Acres blog. Carlos Mencia is everything comedy shouldn't be: hackneyed, mean-spirited, counterfeit. Here's a sample of his Internet comedy.




Did you know you can smash a microphone against your forehead?

Skot vs. Katt Williams: Congrats to Skot but I gotta go with Katt Williams. I just agree with his philisophy "Enjoy your life." Most comics (myself included) like to bitch. Refreshing attitude.


You gangbangin' on bacon?

Ze Frank vs. Brock Baker: Ze Frank. Any questions? Class dismissed.

Brad Neely vs. Nick Swardson: Nick Swardson is what Dane Cook should be: smart dude/bro comedy.




What if that's your thing?


Iggy Pop's Roadie vs. The Tenderloins: Outsider humor (like outsider art, humor that is done by amateurs) is the slithery, ferocious predator of all that is contrived and prepared. Big win for roadies: getting laughs and blowjobs since 1955.

David Malki vs. Jim Gaffigan: Gotta go with the Gaff. You heard me.


Here's electricity

Matthew Baldwin vs. Owen Benjamin:
After seeing this video Owen Benjamin's my hero.




It is sad.

Gabriel Delahaye vs. Pablo Francisco: Gabe by default. Pablo Francisco is the hackiest cornball in recorded history.


Daniel Radosh vs. VooDooWop: VooDooWop, whom I've never heard of until today.





Ryan North vs. Brian Posehn: Brian Posehn, lord of the nerds (Patton is king of the nerds).

Bob Powers vs. Barets and Bareta: Obviously I prefer Bob Powers but I gave Barets and Bareta a Belushi Award for Unfunniest Viral Video of '06.

BIG WINNER: Though the Valleywag list and the MySpace list each have six wins, a tie-breaker is impossible so I'll weigh the votes for the Valleywag list. None of the choices made me bristle like the douchebags on MySpace. Congrats Valleywag and all those who got annointed.