Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Moby Schtick: The World's Longest Joke (Part 2)

Previously on Moby Schtick

Part 2

"I wish all atheists believed in God."

The genie released a song from Scott Stapp on the radio where he preaches against God because Mr. Stapp is not king anymore. The latest piece of Stappola blames God for all that's wrong with the world. All the atheists flock to monotheistic temples and the Unitarian suicide bomber is impressed.
"Thank you genie."
"Ain't a thing but a chicken wing, Unibrow. Now who wants their wishes granted next?"

The fat, cheese fondue-stirring samurai stepped forward.

"I stir this fondue pot with my metal sword and metal conducts heat, which makes it unbearable. But my code forces me to stir with a sword. I would like a wooden sword please."

The genie granted the fat samurai his wish, but the swordsman noticed that his experience points went down as a result.

"Could you please raise my experience points?"

"What do I look like, Game Genie?" He reluctantly raised Hattori Fatso's experience points back to normal.

"The way of the samurai preaches against desire, so I might as well stop being a samurai and indulge. I want to kiss the perfect woman."


Stay tuned for tomorrow's episode, when a celebrity makes a cameo appearance and a depressing road trip ensues.

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